boyfriend ignores me for mobile phone

Does your partner ignore you for their mobile phone? Does your relationship suffer because of their obsession with technology?

For anyone who’s been following my blog and articles since the very beginning (Bravo to you!) you might remember me writing about how people’s mobile phones is ruining their sex lives and relationships.

Photographer Eric Pickersgill has completed an interesting project called, “Removed.” It’s a photographic series that “explores the way personal devices play a role in society, relationships, and the body.”

Eric Pickersgill explains;

“The impulse was to look at human bodies next to one another and what was that posture and that language, of isolation, while physically touching someone else,” he said. “I was making observations about my life. I’m a photographer who has to make work because that’s how I identify, and that was the thing that was in front of me the most; I couldn’t get away from it, and the project came about from those life experiences.”

portraits-holding-devices-removed-eric-pickersgill-22

I love this series because it really highlights how fragmented and disconnected couples can become with too much technology. Pickersgill explains;

“The joining of people to devices has been rapid and unalterable. The application of the personal device in daily life has made tasks take less time. Far away places and people feel closer than ever before. Despite the obvious benefits that these advances in technology have contributed to society, the social and physical implications are slowly revealing themselves. In similar ways that photography transformed the lived experience into the photographable, performable, and reproducible experience, personal devices are shifting behaviors while simultaneously blending into the landscape by taking form as being one with the body. This phantom limb is used as a way of signaling busyness and unapproachability to strangers while existing as an addictive force that promotes the splitting of attention between those who are physically with you and those who are not.”

I wholeheartedly support mindful socialising!

Part of my daily practice of mindfulness is to put my phone away in my bag when I go out and not getting it out. I see too many people out and about but not interacting with their friends or their environment because they’re just staring at their phone.

Mindfulness is about being in the present.

Try putting down your phone in public and noticing everything around you. The wind on your face. The feeling of your feet on the floor. The sounds. The vision. The smells. Leave your phone in your pocket and breathe.

Get in touch today if you’d like to wean yourself off your technology addiction, bring more mindfulness into your life and be closer to your partner.

Read my latest article published in CIAO magazine..

Last night I went to a restaurant and saw a couple sitting in silence; one looking at her phone, more interested in scanning the internet or playing games than in interacting. Once the food arrived she kept fiddling with her phone while they ate.

They didn’t say much and were emotionally disconnected from each other. I see this a lot.

More and more people are coming to me complaining that their partner ignores them for their mobile phone. They seek connection and intimacy with their partner but they’re rejected for time with an electronic device instead.

An English study shows that your relationship can be negatively influenced just by having your phone next to you, even if you don’t touch it. Partners said they trusted the other less and felt less empathy towards them when they had their mobile near them when talking about anything important.

In our fast paced lives it can be detrimental to a relationship if the only spare time you have together is always compromised and overusing your phone can hurt your relationship long term – say if your partner can’t give you their full attention because they are distracted by their phone and social media.

A growing percentage of people need to check their phone at least once an hour and some people even check their phones when on the toilet. With such multitasking minds, how do we learn to focus on one thing in the bedroom if we are not used to doing that during the day? That ‘mind chatter’ can make it difficult to have enjoyable sex, orgasms and connection.

My suggestion is when you go on a date with your partner, put your phone away, on silent or turn it off. Talk to your partner uninterrupted, even if just for 20 minutes a day! And really pay attention to your partner; eye contact, sitting close and touching can be very intimate and sexy when you are talking.

Start trying to practice ‘being in the moment’ when you are doing everyday activities like eating or washing up. For instance, when you are walking, experience your feet hitting the ground and the air on your face.

Concentrate on what is happening in the present moment, your breathing and what your body is feeling. Engage all your senses in these experiences. Practicing regular mindfulness reduces anxiety and depression and increases libido and positive body image.

Once you’ve sharpened your skills of being mindful in the world, you can start practicing mindful sex! It’s about being completely submerged in the sensations and pleasure of the moment and leads to greater connection, mind blowing sex and better relationships. For more on how to have mindful sex, don’t miss the next issue of Ciao.

You can read my article on the CIAO website here!

Get in touch with me here to learn mindfulness techniques and how to apply them in a session with your partner. I look forward to hearing from you!

Tag: boyfriend ignores me for mobile phone

Look how disconnected couples are when this photographer removes their phones from the photos!

Is your Iphone killing your sex life?